It is so good to see in myself a desire
to live and be safe and protect my babies.
They were terrified.
(Well, I was scared too.)
It felt good to be scared.
It's good for me to realize that they aren't secure yet.
Their world is still so shaken, so much turned up side down, so much grief in the all the people they trust the most.
So then, something that should be normal childhood summer-time -- tornado warnings -- are terror for them.
It was good for me to see.
I am their mommy.
I will do everything in my power to keep them safe.
I did bring blankets, a radio, and the important stuff, Laffy Taffy, downstairs.
"Mommy, you haven't prayed yet."
And we did.
And I thought that no matter what happened, my littlest man was safe.
We're fine. . . just part of summer.
Blankets in the washer.
But each day, I learn another lesson in the school of grief.
I want to live.
I shall not die,
the works of the Lord