Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Definition of Okay

How do you say you are "ok" when nothing is ok?

What okay means right now:



No tears


Ability to meet social obligations

Putting one foot in front of the other

Not screaming in anguish

Not face down on the floor

Not pounding our fists against the wall {at the moment}

Taking care of our kids


Doing laundry

Pretending to care

Going through the motions

Hanging on to the threads of hope that we have been given by God.

"I will go before you and level the mountains {to make the crooked places straight}. . . and I will give you the treasures of darkness, and hidden riches of secret places, that you may know that it is I, the Lord. . . Who calls you by your name." from Isaiah 45:2,3, Amplified


  1. love that song...in my arms. Thanks for sharing. and I'm glad you're doing "OK". that in itself is an evidence of God's grace in your lives. Love you. Still praying.

  2. It is good to grieve. To remember your loss, to not stuff it. Your blog is a perfect place to do that. I am praying.

  3. I think it's perfectly okay to say you're NOT okay.

    In the words of Sanctus Real:

    "I'm not alright,
    I'm broken inside,
    Broken inside....
    And all I go through,
    leads me to You,
    leads me to You....
    That's why I need You."

    You have ZERO obligation to be "okay".

    Hang in there friend. I'm still praying and if there's anything I can do, just speak the word!

  4. Oh, Hayley. My heart still breaks with yours. For some reason I think God is allowing me to help bear your grief... and I feel it so keenly. Somehow it feels like life should have puased, doesn't it? And yet, it keeps moving on. I'm here for ya if you ever need anything.


  5. Just keep surviving Hayley, just one step at a time, one minute at a time. You have two small and beautiful reasons that will help you to keep going.

    A few minutes ago I was crying in the shower because I miss my Mom, it has been five years already and sometimes feels like if it was yesterday when we hug and talk to each other. I miss her so much! Emilio was only two months old when she passed away and he was the one pulling me out from sinking to the bottom, sometimes every hour, sometimes everyday. I still sometimes feel like I'm trying to survive. Love you Hayley.