Saturday, July 24, 2010

not type a. . .

I spent some time today searching for blogs and resources on infant loss and SIDS. . .

Lots and lots of sites for miscarriage/stillbirth. . .

. . .not too many for making your coffee / taking a shower / going upstairs and finding your baby in Heaven.

I want to know how other parents deal with the shock. I feel like I am still reeling.

I know that some think we are getting over it or going on; I don't think they realize that we are still trying to wrap our minds around the fact that Gabe even died.

I wrote a friend the other day . . .we are so lame right now. Thank you for inviting us. . .we do want to get together and we love you guys. We so don't know how to be. We feel like we went from type-a happy people to social misfits. We want to spend time with you- if you can stand to be around us!

I tried to express this to Marlys the other night as she rescued me from another social event, allowing me to escape to the refuge of their home.

I'm so sorry that I'm such a sponge!

What would we do without the people who have let us be sponges, absorbing their strength and love and care and faith?

We wouldn't be able to cope.

Not that I would say I'm coping well - what does that mean, anyway?

I am not coping. I am being carried by a strength greater than my own.


  1. a strength greater than your own ... may God continue to give you strength ... day by day, minute by minute.

  2. This is a link to a news story, they lost their daughter 3.24.10. Keep looking to faith and family/friends to hold you up and get you all through this.

  3. is a really good website that revolves around SIDS, in the middle of the homepage is a section for grieving families.

  4. If I could recommend a blog with an amazing Christian lady who has lost 3 children to heaven, all totally different circumstances. None like yours, but she has created a support section called growing through affliction for helping others dealing with the loss of loved ones. If you care to check it out it is :
    Continuing to keep you in my prayers

  5. I understand what you mean about being in shock....and trying to wrap your minds around what just happened. It doesn't seem possible, or real. Someone I love very dearly committed suicide this past April...and I simply cannot understand. I just know that God is with me always, and though he slay me, yet will I trust him.

    There are so many facets of grief, as I am learning...
    Praying for you...

  6. Mmmm, it's perfectly good to be a sponge. for as long as you need to be. You have to figure out what works for you guys, you're figuring out a whole new family in a whole new world. let others pour their loving water onto you as long as you need it. I love you and still pray for you guys. hugs!

  7. Moment by moment, one step at a time
    Light is before you and your hand in Mine.
    Take for this day all the grace you will find
    And moment by moment I'll walk by your side.

    Moment by moment, relinquish control
    Yielded and willing; committing your all
    Hold fast to the faith and press on toward the
    And moment by moment you're reaching the goal.

    Moment by moment, on Me will you wait?
    Strength for each step is here for you to take.
    And though you grow weary, My promise is true
    My grace is sufficient to carry you through.

    Moment by moment, not looking ahead.
    Just focus on Me, child, I'll see that you're
    Know that My plan for you only is best
    And moment by moment just walk in My rest.