Monday, July 26, 2010

beautiful ending

email to my friend Phoebe. . .

Today - I just have to share this with someone - was the incredible realization of God's Hand in a song I picked for Gabe's birth playlist. It's called Beautiful Ending, by one of my favorite girl-bands :-) and I just liked the melody and feel of the song, also that my pregnancy was ending (YAY!) and the ending of the pregnancy would be beautiful, I thought. (It was!) Yet now, the words to this song have incredible meaning next to Gabe's short little life - So tell me / What is our ending / Will it be beautiful / Will my life / find me by Your side / Your love is beautiful / At the end of it all I wanna be in Your arms.

Looking back, it seems like the weirdest song in the universe to choose to welcome a baby into the world, but I can hear that beautiful music reverberating through that delivery room as we brought that little guy into our family to love for such a short time - and it WAS beautiful. And the end - it was beautiful, too, and as peaceful, I think, as death can be. And he is in the arms of Jesus.

How can I not see the beautiful ending?


  1. Hayley,

    I haven't had my computer out lately but decided this morning to look through my blog list. Yours came up and I was shocked to see that you lost your precious baby. I am so saddened for your family and feel sick inside for what you must be going through.

    I hope you don't mind me asking, but had Gabe had his 4 month vaccinations yet? I only ask because I am supposed to leave in half an hour to take my 2 month old to get his first vaccinations. I've been praying about what to do about them and feel uneasy about it all. I'm not sure what I'm going to do.

    Your family will be in my prayers. I wish there was something more I could do. I will be praying for you.

  2. Just wanted you to know you have been on my mind. I am praying for you and for your family. I just pray that you have a peace that only comes from God. I know that sounds "churchy", we have not been through what you have, but there have been tough times where we have truly experienced peace.

  3. Beautiful Post Hayley. I cried for you today when I heard "Held" today on my way to walmart.

    I so wish I could do something to ease your pain.

    I pray often, I hope you can feel it.