purple books & pay for mommies

The real reason for this little post is so that I don't forget how crazy my conversations with my kids can be. 

In the space of fifteen minutes we can cover everything from sex to buffalo to why stay-at-home moms don't draw a paycheck.  Whew.  I can barely keep up with all of the rabbit trails.

Driving.

To doctor appointment.

*pass buffalo ranch*

Cambria:  We can't get a buffalo because we don't have enough room for it.

JD:  Well, I would like to be a buffalo. Or a snake.  Did you know that snakes have like 150 bones in their spines?

Both children agree that they'd like to be snakes.

Brief silence. 

Cambria:  Are Pastor Jake and Loren married?

(Well, they are expecting their third child, have wedding pictures hanging in their living room and both wear rings on their left hands. . . I wasn't at the wedding, but I'm pretty sure they're married. . .)

So begins a brief explanation of wedding rings.

Do rings on the fourth finger of your left hand ALWAYS mean you're married?

Well, no.

JD:  So say, if you saw a like. . . almost fifteen year old with a ring on their left hand they are probably not married, they just are wanting to look nice.

Umm, yes.

Mull over this information.

JD:  Well, you always know people are married if they have kids or if they're pragg-nent.

Ooh, choices.  I could let this one go.  I opt for a teachable moment.

Well, actually, you don't have to be married to have kids or get pregnant.  Remember what we learned in the purple books?  It takes sex to have babies and not everyone who does that is married.  It's God's plan to save sex for being married and everything works better that way, but people do have children without being married.    *whew.*

JD:  What's sex?

Ohhh, I thought we covered this in the infamous purple books (so dubbed by my family. . . I'm not sure these books are actually purple, but if you heard someone groan, oh, no, Mom got the purple books out again, you definitely knew what was being discussed).

Remember. . . what we read about the other day. . .?

Oh, yes yes yes.

*cross fingers that this won't be discussed at AWANA tonight*

Thirty seconds of silence.

JD:  God can see me right now.  He can see my thumb.  He can even see my math and my pencil.  And he knows what I will be when I grow up even though I keep changing my mind!

Me:  That's why it's a good idea to ask God for help when you're deciding what you want to do or be, since He already knows.

Cambria:  Well, I know what I want to be when I grow up.  A girl.

JD:  huh?!

Cambria:  I mean, a wife.

JD:  Well, that isn't a job.

Me:  Yes, being a mom and wife is a job, Jacob.

JD:  It doesn't pay money!

Good point, my son.

Cambria:  I could mow our lawn for the dad!  (by dad, she means husband)

Jacob:  You don't get paid for mowing your own lawn.

Cambria:  the future un-paid stay at home momma

(reading Huckleberry Finn on my e-reader out of sheer determination to have dibs on the device)
Jacob:  future. . . um. . . something.  I think it will involve making money.

This is me with my kids frantically trying to think up correct answers to their questions!

And car trips. . . home of the wildest conversations!

Oh, they crack me up!